The many mantra's of BiPolar Disorder

I came across the below link when you get to it, that offers 20 messages for the BiPolar sufferer, the problem I have with this though is that when you are navigating BPD and Working you have to bring something to the party, you have to have a degree of performance at work.    What I'm trying to say is that the many mantra's out there are often, rightly, attending to self BUT the reality of work is that you can't switch off for hours at a time, you do have to learn, with help, how to navigate your condition and your work environment.

It doesn't mean that the mantra's are not of value, they just seem a little me me me sometimes and as mental health sufferers we still have to work,live with everyone else on a day to day basis.

Have a look
Reflect
See what I mean ........ some are more engaged with the World than others .........

http://themighty.com/2016/03/20-messages-for-anyone-who-feels-restricted-by-a-bipolar-disorder-diagnosis1/

Of value but very self-centric, the world turns still while we navigate our conditions as well.

Happy Easter all, may we all 'rise' with the road .............

Sunday Evening Syndrome & BPD

BiPolar is an interesting condition to have.  I had 'Sunday Evening Syndrome' this last Sunday as I had been on holiday for a week and a half and a lot of the BPD symptoms were mulling around in various ways.

My head was switching from can't keep up with it all to can do it all, from can't possibly fail to irritation that I didn't think I would be able to hit the ground running after a week and a half wrapped up in my family and far from work ( well apart from when my anxiety meant I logged into my work eMail account ).
Depression teetered, doubting my ability to do anything well, my mind feeling like it was burning out and that I was virtually useless.  Folks say 'it will pass' and they are right BUT in the moment this and the anxiety and so unnerving.  I thought I had built up some resilience recently as I had a good 4 weeks full time before my holiday and things had gone okay.

Then, off the back of some great family times I had a bounce into Mania, fast ideas coming too fast, too many ideas.  In stead of clarity there is an overwhleming confusion but a belief that I'm on the curve, I think my humour is brilliant BUT it fails to amuse others.  Everything ends up against the grain. 
It seems that, basically, my condition seems to have exacerbated my 'Sunday Evening Syndrome', eventually I get to grips with it all to some degree, I find some distraction, I create time for mindfulness and breathing ( pulling myself away from Mania ). 
Eventually I get to sleep later that night, a short nights sleep and I'm at work Monday morning, tired as a Dog BUT I'm at work, I haven;t succumbed to despair and mania, I haven't beaten my condition BUT I have navigated it.  I'm tired all day Monday but I acheive a few small things and a sense of stability is there by the end of the day.

The problem is that this condition has exhausted me and that's ridiculous and perhaps hard to run by others as I don't want to live off excuses or be a passenger at work and so I continue to try and navigate my condition through my tiredness and I'm glad that my mood swings have settled.
Just wanted to try and get across teh effort that the condition can some times require to navigate it.
***END*** 

Do No Evil .............

Its just recently been brought to my attention that Sunday April 10^th is Good Deeds Day 2016.  This is an initiative that has taken off in the last 10 years from quite a humble start.  One of the things that Happify.Com has brought out of this upcoming Day is that the very process of doing a good deed is in theory good for your mental health.  So here we have altruistic behaviour that you could engage with that will actually do you good even though your initial beginnings might just be that you want to do the world a favour.

Google started with it’s mantra many years ago of ‘Do No Evil’ and now with it’s pervasive search engine and it’s lack of tax paying in countries where it makes a profit, you could say that the holding back of tax payments might be construed as ‘not doing good’ or making their contribution to what might be used for social good in various countries.

Anyway that’s a bit of a tangent really, regards Google.  Just a bugbear I have, a little like the fact that the ‘X Factor’ isn’t  really a TV show looking for someone with the ‘X Factor’  as they tend to find the same types of singers year on year, just another one of them………….

Anyway, as  I said, that’s all tangential.  ‘Doing Good’ allegedly decreases Stress.  There have been studies that have looked at the link between volunteering for example and hypertension, it was found in a 2013 study that giving back, doing good, volunteering etc etc can have a significant positive affect on blood pressure.  There are other studies that align with the position that giving money and time away can also have the same affect, basically having a generous demeanour will benefit you and also you may well get that ‘Helpers high’ where the brain releases endorphins, feel good chemicals in your brain. 

Now this is where it gets tricky as I want to share my own sense of ‘Doing Good’ but I don’t want folks to think I’m blowing my own trumpet, what I do want to do though is give a sense that you can engage with this as I have tried to with a degree of organisation.  I have a 6.66 fund which I use for donations to Just Giving etc causes so that I can support people who ask me without having to think how much to donate as I have a rate that I set and that’s what I use, I like to be able to do this giving, it does feel good that you laready know you’ve allowed for that in your monthly budgeting. Someone asks me and if it’s something I like the idea of, I donate £6.66.  I then try and be thankful myself, sounds a bit twee I agree by ‘Paying it Forward’ as I know people have done stuff for me, so I look each week for something that I can just do when the opportunity arises to help someone out without there being any payback for me, I don’t look for things that would over reach me like say, painting the whole of someones house BUT something like last week where I got someones shopping for them because they couldn’t get out to do it.  I guess I’m just saying that it’s not normally too much of an ‘ask’ to deliver on ‘Good Deeds’ as you can limit them to what you, as a person can manage.  With mental health challenges you would often have to do that but there is a benfit to engaging with this attitude.

As ever, I hope this make some degree of sense.

Tony

Good Deed Day ~~ http://gdd.goodnet.org/about

 ***END***

Never Mind the Polyps

............. a little something I did for friends for Prostate Cancer awareness:-  ( deliver in JCC style-e )

Never Mind the Polyps
(cc) Tony Amis, 2016

Lets kick cancer in the balls
Everyday check in your smalls
Testicular cancer easier to find
Fiddling down there won’t make you blind

A harder topic that might need a Proctor
Get that well man booking with the Doctor
They might stick a finger up your bum
For some of our friends that’s probably fun

Only men have a prostate gland
Creates our semen ain’t that grand
Its the shape of a walnut underneath the bladder
Its the size of the head of a grass snake adder

Over the years its been a blast
Urinate, get in, wiggle about, ejaculate last
Well our women will tell us thats not the truth
Ejaculate fast ever since we were youths

Now prostate cancers not that funny
In old buggers like me its worth being prepared
If youre up all night having multiple wees
Every few hours its worth becoming aware
Other things it might be worth taking note
Difficulty when having a pee
Straining or a long time finishing your wee
A slow flow when urinating
A feeling youre not emptying your bladder that keeps you waiting
Sometimes leaking before you get to the loo
Dribbling wee when youre having a poo
Dribbling wee after you’ve finished
Speak to your Doctor and check alls okay
Men, think about checking these things today

The Prostate has played its quiet innings for the bedroom department
As old buggers lets think about symptoms in these days we are less ardent

***END***

Its such a perfect day I want to spend it with you .................

Today is February 14th, valentines day.  I think a lot of us look at valentines day with healthy skepticism, ultimately because with your partner, lover, wife, husband, every day should be special just because you are together.  In a way I feel valentines day cheapens 'real love'.

There are 364 other days in the year where we can choose to celebrate our relationships and I'm pretty sure those days are better days to do that than February 14th.  It's not a hallmark cards invented tradition though, as paper valentines cards date back to the 19th century.  

The holidays roots are roman, around fertility and in the 5th century a Pope created a feast day the day before the age old fertility festival to be Saint Valentines Day.

There are a number of things that I think we need to do to keep our relationships healthy.

1. Don't compare your relationship to other peoples relationships.  All relationships are unique.

2. Don't strive for your idea of perfection in your partner. 

3. Vive le difference.

4. Acknowledge the things you and your partner are good at, play to your strengths.

5. Spend time doing each others favourite things.

6. I think it's okay to be assertive in a relationship, don't be treated without respect, if your relationship is strong this should be a given anyway.

7. You still need to find time to do the things that you enjoy as individuals.

So that's my recipe.  Now let's turn that on it's head.  If you are suffering with your mental health challenges, the advice for a relationship could be the advice to yourself.  Looking at those 7 above targetted at you as an individual.

1. Don't compare yourself to other people. 

2. Don't strive for perfection.

3. Vive le difference, all people are not created equal.

4. Acknowledge the things that you are good at, your strengths.

5. Treat yourself well, do things you enjoy

6. Be assertive, don't let people treat you with little or no respect

7. Engage in work and hobbies you enjoy

Well, i'm not sure that makes sense but it did when I started writing it ............. Now I have 2 holidays Monday & Tuesday to recharge myself after my first full week back at work last week.

Mindfulness is a skill ..........

mindfulness is hard ...........

The following are tips for mindfulness at work.

They may help / they may not.

A lot of folks tell me ( and I myself find ) that it’s really hard being mindful at work, even in short bursts.

·         Not judging your thoughts becomes easier with practice. Avoid logical left brain thinking, label the thoughts and pack them away.

·         Try not to judge yourself as well, don’t get cross with yourself as that will defeat the object of your mindful moments.

·         Try checking in with the body, this should distract your thoughts. Asking ‘How is the old left shoulder blade’ today may stop your mind wandering.

·         Experiment and discover which flavours of the above work for you, allowing you to continue being mindful.

The science behind mindfulness is quite basic.  Paying attention to the sole process of breathing means that you are increasing activity in the attention association are of your brain, you are concentrating rather than logically thinking.  Allegedly sitting in an upright position aides triggering positive neural circuit activity.  Breathing and focussing on that tends to switch your brain from habitual thinking to creative thinking, thinking that helps.  Over time as you utilise mindful thinking your parasympathetic nervous system is activated which should lead to a mentally clear and alert state of mind.

Resilience to be Cheerful part 3

Resilience to be Cheerful part 3

Except its really just Part 2, but that isn't a play on the Ian Dury song 'Reasons to be Cheerful Part 3', enough, okay I'll move on.

In discussions with my GP, Mental Health Nurse, Talking Therapist I recognised the need for resilience as I begun to see an ever so slight upturn in my depression and anxiety before my failed return to work in October last year before I again returned 12th November.  I was very much afraid that I would relapse again and again and again for the rest of my working life having episodes of Depression, Anxiety in 2010, 2012, 2014 and now 2015 ......... I was afraid that I would be boom and bust mentally for the years upto my retirement.  Right now I'm feeling a tad more optimistic again regards this as I have my first full time working weeks next week and the week after.  I need resilience and robustness because I don't want to be in a cycle of relapse and recovery at close proximity.  I guess I can't promise myself respite from this nor can my health professionals but I know I need to work as hard as I can to avoid that relapse cycle.

Resilience is all about me growing my capacity to handle difficulties, demands, any high pressure situations without becoming overtly stressed or triggered into depression/anxiety/mania.  I don't have a magic wand, I'm aware that I can only do what I can do and hope that it builds resilience and robustness over time.

I think from a headline position its about:-

• Not wasting energy on unimportant small matters
• Being flexible to change ( harder to do than say )
• Ian Holroyd's Bouncebackability ( football manager saying )
• Making the best of any new situation
• In all the above, seeing off the negative demon on your shoulder
• Mindful working
• Mindful living
• Seeing and understanding fight or flight respones as they arise
• Not being hard on self ( avoiding perfectionism )
• Don't judge own thoughts
• Don't get cross if you are negative, forgive yourself quickly
• Plan your day but dont Judge your day against that plan ( flexibility )
• Allow yourself happiness

There is no magic wand but all the above are going in my little red notebook.  Allowing me to focus on my best chance for resilience and robustness.

We'll see how it all goes.